


You Know What You Are?

by Into_Parabola



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Boys Kissing, Cult, First Kiss, Funeral, Gay, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Kissing, M/M, The Impala (Supernatural), Westboro Baptist cult, baptists, cemetary, church, protest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23873425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Into_Parabola/pseuds/Into_Parabola
Summary: When Dean and Cass encounter the Westboro Baptist Cult on a job, all there is to do is gay it up
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 69
Collections: The Destiel Fan Survey Favs Collection





	You Know What You Are?

**Author's Note:**

> An idea I've had for a while and got a lot of positive feedback on over tumblr. Keeping it short, but I hope you like it. Despite Supernatural being one of my favorite shows I almost never write for it, so I'm a little rusty. I'd love feedback

"Cass, will you please, _please_ not touch anything? We're nearly there, I promise. The church is three blocks away." Dean eyed his companion almost parentally and Castiel slowly withdrew his hand from the car's cassette player. 

"Thank you." 

"I'm sorry, Dean. I just... I miss my wings," Cass mumbled. "Traveling is infuriatingly slow now..."

"I know, buddy, I know. I'm sorry too. But this is the way things are now. Besides, it beats sitting at home doing nothing for three days, even if the ride is a bitch." Dean reached over to pat his companion's knee comfortingly, squeezing a little before retracting it. 

They were both dressed in their fake pastor outfits for a job. A priest in Colorado had been found eviscerated and drained of all bodily fluids. With Sam gone to Arizona for a week to work a solo case, it had fallen to Dean and Cass to take this one. By now Dean was used to hiding his confusing feelings for the angel, even in close quarters. But it was still a test for him. 

"Is this common with driving?" Cass cocked his head and stared at the surprisingly thick town traffic. 

"What, not having hardly any traffic through an entire boring day of driving just to run into all the slow dicks when you're five minutes away from where you were heading, like the universe is trying to rub it in your face?" Dean shrugged. "Pretty much."

He fell momentarily silent and tapped on Baby's steering wheel, then groaned. "Screw this," he muttered and pulled over at the curb, then stopped the car. 

"Dean?" Cass looked at him quizzically. 

"You were right, traffic sucks. I can see the church from here," he gestured through the windshield where the top of the church's steeple could be seen past a line of crawling, honking cars. "We'll make better time if we just walk it."

With that, he opened the door and stepped out. Castiel quickly followed and the duo made their way around to the Impala's trunk. 

"Alright, here's what I'm thinking," Dean started as he popped the trunk and opened the hidden weapons compartment without a care for all the cars going by, "we should make it in time for the end of the funeral. We'll talk to some people there, gather whatever information we can, then split up. Now, the body was found inside the church. Consecrated ground, so probably not a demon. Still, could be a ghost so you take this!" 

He clapped an EMF reader into Cass' hand then pressed on as the angel slipped it into his pocket. "Of course, he was drained and found right next to a graveyard so my money is on Ghoul or Vamp. Still, I'll have a look around the church, see what there is to see, poke around for Hex Bags, et cetera." He worked a ring into his middle finger and passed a similar one over to Cass.

"What's this for?" The angel held it up in the light, closing one eye to look at it.

"Pure iron. We can't bring shotguns into a crowded public place in broad daylight, so on the off-chance it is a ghost and we run into it, just punch it..." He lowered his eyes a little embarrassedly. "Sam found it in one of Becky's weird fanfictions... We laughed our asses off before realizing it was... kinda a good idea." 

"Dean, I'm an angel. I have no need for protection from ghosts, they can do no terminal damage to me." 

"Damnit, Cass, just put the ring on. It took a lot of work to get the size right for you." 

Cass rolled his eyes but did as he was asked, purposefully mirroring Dean and sliding it onto his middle finger. Dean nodded once, then closed the trunk and jerked his head towards the church. "Let's hope this ends up a quickie; one thing I know about Colorado is all the diners have amazing food, and we passed four on this street alone!" 

He grinned then whirled around, making for the church. Cass rolled his eyes again and followed after him. "It's not going to be a 'quickie,'" he muttered to himself. "It's never a quickie."

They made it to the church in under a minute. After that it was just a short walk around the side to the cemetery. When it came into view Dean swore loudly. In the middle of the graveyard were two clearly different groups of people. One wore all black and nervous looks, and were gathered around a coffin and a rectangular hole in the earth. The others were maybe twenty yards away and behind two bored-looking cops, and were shouting at the first group while waving about an assortment of signs. 

"Who are they?" Cass asked, nodding at the obnoxious group. 

"They would be the reason traffic is a bitch. They would be massive wastes of space and air," Dean growled, clenching and unclenching a fist. 

"That... Doesn't answer my question." 

"They're the Westboro Baptist Cult."

Cass cocked his head. "That still doesn't answer my question."

Dean sighed and started heading for the mourners, gesturing for Castiel to follow him. "They're a bunch of arrogant dicks who's whole purpose seems to be making gay people miserable. I'm guessing our decapitated pastor was gay, something I wish Sammy had mentioned when he sent me this case, and they're here protesting his funeral. Because that's a thing they do."

Cass peered at the signs they were holding. "'Reverend Barns will burn in hell?' 'We want justice?' I don't understand... If they're against him and he's dead, what exactly do they want justice for?" 

"I don't know, Cass. These people are idiots. They're a bunch of Karen zealots whose whole personality boils down to 'I'm angry at gay people,' so if it sounds angry they'll slap it on a sign."

As they approached the burial group a member broke off and hurried up to them. A man younger than Dean would have expected, yet completely bald, and wearing what looked like robes adorned with a purple sash-like ribbon. Clearly a member of the church. 

"I'm sorry, gentleman, this service is not open to the public. Of course, as you can see, the public still finds a way..." He jerked his head at the protesting cult, who were still jeering incessantly. "But you don't look like you're with them. Still, I'll have to ask that you please maintain a respectable distance." 

Dean cleared his throat. "Oh, no, I'm sorry, there's a slight misunderstanding. We're not here for the service, per se. We're here to look into... What was his title, minister? The dead dude's death." 

"Reverend," the young man supplied, "and I'm sorry, are you...?" He looked Dean and Cass up and down. Dean thought he saw the man's eyes longer on their matching rings. 

"Are we gay too?" 

"What? No, are you from the UCC?" 

Dean blushed a little. "O-oh. I mean, yes, we are!" 

The man's eyes narrowed. "I don't see why the Church would send you all the way out here to 'look into' Reverend Barns' death." 

"Well, could have been demons?" Dean tried for a smile that just made him look guilty. 

"Demons... Wow. Are you sure you aren't Catholics?" The man asked. "We're a very forward-thinking church. We believe science has a place in God's universe. We're not mindless fanatics like those protesting lunatics. So please forgive me when I say that I'm skeptical that you and your partner are from my church." 

Dean stared at him, at a loss for what to say. He grabbed Cass' arm quite suddenly, making Cass, who had been staring at the protestors, jump. "Do you mind if me and my... partner... have a quick talk?"

The man gestured vaguely then crossed his arms. Dean took it as a yes and pulled Cass back a few yards. "Okay... That has never happened before. Admittedly, Sammy and I _do_ normally deal with Catholics, religious diehards, or both, and they usually eat the demon stuff up. We're going to need a new angle." 

Cass grunted in general assent, his eyes still on the protestors. Dean snapped his fingers in front of his face, pulling Cass' attention back on him. "Damnit, Cass, focus!"

"I was listening," Cass replied thickly. "Something about angles." 

"Will you please forget the gay protestors for a minute and pay attention?" 

"I'm sorry, Dean. They're just so... Captivating. I'm trying to figure out what happened to have misled so many people. Maybe I should talk to them?"

"That's probably not a great idea. These people are deeply stuck in their beliefs. I mean, what kind of dick shows up to protest a funeral just because that guy liked other dudes?" Dean snapped again, quite suddenly and for an entirely different reason. "I just got it! Our new angle!" 

Cass blinked, not making whatever snap connection Dean had made, and stared at him, puzzled. Dean ignored the look and dragged Cass back over to the church man. 

"We are gay," he said with no preamble. 

"We are?" Cass said. His eyes widened as he realized what Dean was getting at. "I mean, we are." 

Dean took Cass' hand in his own and raised them both up to show the matching iron rings. "I'm sorry we misled you. We really are from... a church. Just not from the UPS-"

"UCC."

"Right, that." Dean released Cass' hand and stepped forward, trying to adopt a look of sincerity. "Um, the thing is, people aren't very accepting where we're from. We're not used to it. But we heard about his death, the death of an openly gay Reverend, and it inspired us. We wanted to come pay our respects, but also to learn what we could about his life. So I made up a story about the church sending us here to try and sneak in." Dean met the man's gaze, hoping the held eye contact would help sell the lie. 

The man's whole demeanor changed. He uncrossed his arms and nodded solemnly, all suspicion gone. "I completely understand. Well, almost. I'm not gay myself, but I know it must be hard for you, especially with them here," he gestured towards the protestors. "You can stay. I'm sure it would mean a lot to Reverend Barns that this helped you."

Dean nodded and looked over to the protestors when the man pointed them out. "Thank you, sir, for understanding. I promise you we'll be out of your hair in a-" his eyes widened and he stopped speaking abruptly. Cass was gone from his side and striding purposefully towards the Westboro crowd. "Son of a bitch!" 

"He really shouldn't be going near them! Most of them are lawyers, and they're really good at getting under people's skin, no good can come of this!" 

"Stay here," Dean instructed. "I'll bring him back." He patted the man's shoulder then rushed after Cass, who had stopped just in front of the group. The two cops seemed entirely unperturbed. 

"You don't understand," Cass was saying as Dean arrived, "sexual preference is not and has never been a sin. Heaven really couldn't care less." He pointed at one of the signs bearing **GOD HATES FAGS.** "And you do realize that God is bisexual?" 

The crowd booed and threw multiple slurs at him. 

"Cass," Dean hissed. "I'm going to need you to get your feathery ass away from these dickheads." 

"Dean, someone has to explain this to them." Cass retorted calmly. "They've strayed so far."

"Do you faggots even know the bible?" A woman at the front sneered. 

"Lady, all due respect, which is to say absolutely zero, but piss off. Of course I know the bible!" Dean gestured at his white collar. He felt a little bad lying about being a minister, but in actuality he _did_ know his bible, more or less. 

"Man shall not lie with man!" The woman replied.

"Love thy neighbor as thyself, or some shit," Dean called back. "Damnit, this isn't the way you deal with these idiots!" 

Years of repressed and denied feelings rose to the surface quite suddenly. Dean felt his chest tightening, not with fear or anxiety, but with angry determination and love. Stupid Cass had to walk his stupid butt over here to engage these pathetic, useless people. And he _had_ to look hot while he did it. 

Dean swore, then grabbed the front of Cass' clothes and pulled him forward. Their chests pressed together and Dean stared into Castiel's vivid blue eyes for a moment, hesitating not because he didn't want to go through with this, but because he was worried that Cass didn't. 

Cass' face set. He grabbed Dean in turn and finished what the other man had started, leaning in and kissing him. 

It was a fierce kiss, full of passion and feelings that had built up inside them both over years and which they'd only let out in tiny bursts, through covetous glances and jokes and the like. Dean closed his eyes and tilted his head to the side, parting his lips a little passively so Cass could thrust his tongue into his mouth. 

The two men moaned out, needy and aggressive, then fell to the ground, still making out passionately with Cass atop Dean. They broke apart after a few moments, blushing as they realized everyone in the cemetery had fallen silent and was staring at them.

"This... Probably wasn't the best time or place to do this..." Dean murmured. "I didn't mean to tell you how I felt in the form of a homophobia protest. But damn am I glad I did!"

"Dean... You do realize that I'm an androgynous being of energy simply inhabiting a body that humans assigned a male concept to, and therefore this isn't truly the protest you think it is, right?" Cass raised an eyebrow. 

"Oh, I don't even care about the protest anymore," Dean grinned. "Just shut up and kiss me again!" 

"F-fag marriage dooms America?" A young man near the front of the Westboro crowd hurled at them without conviction in his voice. As one, Dean and Cass raised their hands and extended their middle fingers to the protestors, then closed their eyes and resumed kissing each other.


End file.
